My Girl Quest

Showing posts with label flirting at work. Show all posts

Aug 5, 2008

That’s PMS, aaaaight?

As you all probably know, I said the big words to I. (no, not “I love you”, but “Bye-bye”). Her reaction was pretty nice and unexpectedly calm, she took it to the chin and even said something like “we’ll have random sex every now and then,” which was pretty cool, you know? So I was ready to become a Don Juan again, re-start my flirting quest and enroll the Flirters Top Spots (and if something like that doesn’t exist, I was ready to create it).

Anyway… the point is that I was happy with what my life was turning into: for the first time in many, many years I had been caught in a love-triangle: P, I and me, two girls and a guy, excitement, more Don Juan-ism and hormones skating freely in my testosterone-filled body. Stuff like that. I was proud.

But things had to turn to the darker side.

Because, as I was anticipating back when my “relationship” with I. was nothing but a big question mark, things at work are pretty ugly now. Remember the episode when she sent me a message to look at her and she opened her legs in a Sharon-Stone-Basic-Instinct type of thing? Well… things are about the same, with a few small differences: she doesn’t send me messages anymore and, whenever it happens that my eyes turn her way, she doesn’t open her legs anymore, but her middle finger rises like a statue up in the air.

Thankfully, she barely talks to me now, which is good. However, I can only believe that all my colleagues at work know (or, at most, will know soon) that I have a tiny little wiener, that I suck in bed, my mouth smells like crap and I was a virgin when I first dated her. OR that I’m gay and like IT big. I dunno… I’m sure it will be something bad, anyway. The good thing is that I don’t have plans to date anybody from work anymore, so it won’t be a loss. However, it still sucks.

Or, just as I said in the title, it could be nothing but I.’s PMS. That would really explain her strange behavior. Case closed!

Jul 31, 2008

Peeping Tom again and some randomness

I’ve been a voyeur before and I totally loved it. Today it happened again and boy, it was exciting! Of course, since I am nothing but a strange person who doesn’t know what he wants from life… I got so excited by I. There is something about her, she manages to surprise me, there is something special about her, after all, something that makes me delay the interruption of our relationship.

I was sitting at my office today, getting bored and pretending I was working, when I received a message from I. “Look,” was everything she wrote and at first I spent quite some seconds waiting for a picture to load or something. But I realized she was talking about the real thing, so I slowly turned my head. She was keeping her legs wide open, allowing me to see under her skirt the fact that she was wearing no lingerie! She only allowed me to view her for five seconds or something, but it was enough to drive me crazy. “It’s aching for you,” was the message that followed from her and I felt like jumping on her right there. It’s this kind of stuff she does that makes me care for her more than I should. She’s fun, she’s unpredictable, she’s kinky. I doubt many girls could’ve done what she did for me, risking to be seen by the others. On the other hand, maybe she likes that. Hmm… :D

*****

P. called me again today. I really had no time for her and this seems to bug her a little. I’m kind of ignoring her and I have the feeling that she’s trying to prove me that she deserves more attention than I'm offering. And, to be honest, I am only offering to give IT to her. If ignorance is

not just a bliss, but also a great way to get the girl, I’m going to be such a winner! :D

*****

I laughed like a mad man when I found out I’m not the only guy having problems with girls. One of my friends has a crush on a chick who works at the supermarket near his house. And according to him (he likes to ~~exaggerate~~ ~~things~~ lie sometimes) the chick kind of flirts with him. The only problem is that the “chick” is a women who has a 15 years-old son. And my friend is 21. Love has no boundaries :D

Jul 29, 2008

Consequences and the clueless mind

I had the time of my life in I’s company and if you didn’t, you must go and read about the crazy girl right now! Well… sort of crazy. Weekend-crazy. Because, it seems that as soon as the week starts, she turns back into her old self: strange, weird, old-school. It doesn’t make sense yet, right?

Well, the things is that on Monday, as soon as I arrived at my workplace, she took me in the bathroom and pleased me there, without even saying "Hi"! No, I was joking :D She did took me inside the bathroom, but instead of wild sex, she said: “You didn’t call me yesterday!” The scary idea that she indeed wants a relationship started to fill the small room. It was all clear when she continued: “What are we going to do? Shall we tell our colleagues about it or we’re keeping it a secret for now?” FOR NOW?!? So it’s not just a relationship, but something that’s going to last a while? Oh, boy, I’m in such a mess!

I told her we should keep this a secret and I’m still thinking on what to do to dump her. To let her understand that we only had fun, that I still have 90 chicks to score and time’s running out. However, to be honest, I’m not doing my best to find a solution, because my egoistical half (or three quarters, or whatever) is still waiting for the weekend. For some more adventures, for sex in the trees, scuba diving and blowjobs… crazy stuff like that! However, I do realize I’m in a huge mess, nevertheless. But, for the moment, things are kind of under control.

But there might be a bomb ticking, ready to blow. Today I got a phone call from P, the shy girl who didn’t get into my bed. If you can believe it, I had completely forgotten about her! And now she called, saying that I’m a pig, that I didn’t call her, that she thought I was different and stuff. And I don’t know about you, but to me this sounds like “relationship” too. It seems it’s harder than I imagined finding chick to have fun with. Flirt, go home, do it and say good-bye. Why is it that hard?

Jul 27, 2008

Wow! Just Wow!

Honestly, that would be enough - repeating over and over again: Wow! Wow! Wow! and so on. I. is a storm. She is absolutely crazy and completely out of this planet. The girl of every man’s dreams and even more. The ultimate fun machine. Honestly. And she doesn’t seem to be crazy (as in a scary kind of way, as I was anticipating). She is wild, she is a beast hidden under some soft skin, because of the job's limitations, probably. But out in the wild, I. is a man-pleasing machine – I’m 100% sure that when she was born, she was singing: “Born to be wiiiiiild!”. I feel blessed.

Best. Weekend. EVER. This could be another way to sum things up (yes, as you can see, I am still very ecstatic and I still feel the adrenaline pumping in my veins, even though I have slept at most 5 hours). Here’s the incredible story:

Just like we were supposed to, we met on Friday and I was pretty nervous: she did to me some really strange things in the past and I had no idea how she would react to our date. Even more, I basically told her, when I got the date, that I’m going to introduce her to a friend of mine. It was obvious that I was just flirting and that was just a figure of speech, but one can never know what a woman understands. So I was nervous and she noticed that. As opposed to me, she was really calm and cool and seemed like a different person than the girl I knew from work. Not to mention that she was incredibly hot, wearing a very tight and sexy black dress. The elegant type, the one that you’d like to get your hands on and rip apart, just like they do in the movies.

Anyway, we ordered something to eat and, most important, some red wine and things eventually started to get a bit more natural. She was not very talkative – quite reserved, I might say – but at least she wasn’t rejecting my whimsy flirt lines. However, there was basically no feedback from her, which was starting to make me feel very uncomfortable. How should’ve I known that her crazy brain was planning? :D

“Let’s go!” she suddenly said at a point when the silence was becoming painful. It was a bit of a surprise for me, but I was anticipating it: I couldn’t have said we were having fun. It was just another failed date and I was ready to accept it. However, a man can never know what a woman wants to say with “let’s go”. And she kept me waiting. She likes to play.

When we got in my car, she said nothing. I was waiting for her to tell me to take her home or something, but she was waiting for my question, so I asked: “Where now?”. She giggled. “We should change clothes,” she said completely confusing me. “So we’re going to my place first”. I asked her a few times what her plans were, but she said I’ll see. “We’ll have fun, she kept repeating”. OK, so she was really waning IT and nothing more, I started to imagine…

When we got to her place, she told me to go up with her. If we would’ve gone in, had sex, then kissed goodbye, it would’ve been something normal. Honestly – now, after what happened with us, I really think that would’ve been the most common thing on earth. But it was much more.

She told me to sit down in one of her armchairs and went out, only to come back with tons of clothes. She asked me if I wanted to have fun and, of course, I said yes. She laughed and told me, like it was the most natural thing: “Then let’s go visit the mountains”. I tried to explain her it was late, we had no place to stay there – that it was a complete madness and she said that was the whole point. “Don’t you like adventures?” she asked me and I eventually agreed. The chick is crazy, I told you!

She took her clothes off, just like that (she was wearing some black lingerie, though) and said that I have to choose her outfit. And what followed next is hard to explain in words (especially in a language that’s not your native one :P). It was like a dance, like a teasing-erotic-breath taking-complete madness thing. I was practically tied to the chair and I was obliged to look at her. She was moving slowly, she was sensual, she was teasing, making me go crazy. But she didn’t let me to do anything: she just changed clothes a few times, telling me to choose which outfit is the best. She didn’t even care that I said (all sweaty and way too excited): “Anything. Honestly, anything!”

When we got to my home, things got even stranger. She said it was my turn, so I had to strip and change a few pairs of jeans and wear different t-shirts. I think she has some kind of strange fetish with clothes and changing them or something like that. A bit odd, anyway, but back then it was the most erotic thing in the world. At one point, while looking at the bulge in my boxers, she said: “It looks like we’re not the only ones wanting to have fun” and I was truly expecting her to jump on me and please me. Or at least help me with the pain. But she did nothing and I was already getting way too excited. But, as you can see, I survived.

So we got in the car and went in a one day-long vacation. We spent the entire day (Saturday) there and things got a bit back to normal. We didn’t do any bungee jumping, fights with snakes or stuff like that. But it was very cool – something I had never done in my life – I’m the kind of dude who likes to plan his vacations to the last detail. This escape was nothing but magic. Pure magic and I’s company was wonderful, too. It’s unforgettable!

Oh, and if you’re wondering if we did it, after all, the answer is… YES! Not just once – and it was magic, too!

Jul 19, 2008

No mystery during the past few days

Time flies, that’s a definite thing. Nothing happens – that’s another. And these two things combined bring nothing but a huge pain in the butt. No flirting means no girls, no girls means no sex, no sex means failure for My Girl Quest – just as my best friend anticipated. Probably I’m just the wrong person to do it and, like Alexis said, I’m not the type of guy who is mentally or physically ready for such a quest. The thing is that I know the basics, I even know a bunch of “advanced” stuff, I can’t complain with my looks nor my charisma, but I just don’t seem ready to do it. I don’t have the balls, I don’t have something and that pisses the hell out of me.

During the past few days things were pretty strange for me at work. I. – the colleague which messed me up a little bit just a while ago – started to act pretty funny again. Among some of the things I would honestly translate as flirting (and I might be wrong, that’s not important), she sent me a bunch of emails – very strange ones – but two of them were particularly strange. Flirting. Romance. Excitement. Sexuality. Call them whatever you want to, there is something strange about them.

The first message I’m talking about was a kind of electronic card – it had the shape of a heart divided into two pieces. One half had a big question mark on it, while the other had her face pictured there. Below the heart was written “Any idea who’s my better half”? So… really now! What was that? What did she mean? I consider it really strange for a girl to send a guy she barely knows an e-card like this one. Especially if that guy had just invited you to his home and you said “no, let’s just be friends”.

Another message she sent me was even stranger, though. It was just one line: “Friday I’m going to a party and I don’t know what to wear. What do you say?” and below were four pictures of her wearing four different outfits. What the hell was this all about?

Did I just found myself a psycho girl? A strange, chaotic, stalking girl? Or just somebody who has absolutely no idea how to make friends? Whatever that is, one thing is certain: I’ll try to stay as far from her as I can.

____________________
Image credits: theharwoods.org

Jul 15, 2008

Relative state of mind: wasted, idiotic

Today was a really strange day and it got proved to me that you can’t understand women. Period. Or that men are just creatures who have no idea about the most basic social interaction types – you talk, I talk, we both listen and that’s it. Nooo, it always has to be a bit more complicated and the “bad” thing has to be on my side. Forever and ever, like a curse, like something which will always go wrong.

Today was one of those days when something unexpected happened at my workplace and they allowed us to go home about four hours earlier. I took advantage of the situation and invited I. (a work colleague who I believe wants IT from me) to have a drink with me. She accepted and we went to a pub nearby. And we started to drink and talked and everything was fine – we were both getting pretty dizzy and I was starting to think if we should go to my place or hers. One thing was clear: we were going to do it and only the day after I was going to worry about what I did. A classic, male-ish situation.

On the other hand, apparently she was in a classic, feminine situation, since when I asked her: “Want to continue it at my place,” she honestly asked me: “Why?” Just like that, plain and simple question I couldn’t have answered honestly in a hundred years. A question I never anticipated and which hit me like a hammer, crushed me like a bug and put me to silent mode.

“Why?” she asked again while I was still staring at her like the dumbest Dumbo, sweating like a pig and trying to find a way out of the whole situation. Unfortunately, the only thing that got to me then was a classic, rather outdated line: I told her I had a bottle of great wine at home. “You’re so silly sometimes,” she replied. “I don’t like wine!”

It was crystal clear: she wanted IT no longer (no pun intended, honestly). After days of looking at me, telling me I’m cute, telling me she has no friends, that she feels alone, that she needs a life… after accepting my God damned invitation to go for a drink (as in just the two of us!) she no longer wants IT. IF she ever wanted IT. I no longer understand anything and I feel like a complete idiot. Was she giving me hints or my mind was playing tricks? Did she change her mind? Was she too scared? I guess I’ll never know, but one thing is clear: I. won’t be on my list too soon :D

Jul 14, 2008

A relatively good start of the week

Unlike last week when I was tired, wasted and ready to be controlled by my boss, I started this week full of life, energy and desire to win as many girls as possible. My flirting mana is to maximum levels, my charm is maximized, too and I am ready to hit the top spot as often as possible: this week I want to break some records when it comes to girls I get my hands on, since I kind of lost momentum and I don't want to make it a habit.

Of course, I did not get too many chances today since I still spend most of my time in an office, but at least I tried a bit more to find out what I.’s intentions really are: as I said before, it’s a really tricky situation here and things could get completely messed up if I do something wrong (I am talking, of course, about the only wrong thing I want to do – with work colleagues, it could get pretty tough :D).

Anyway, I kind of stalked I. the whole day and tried to learn her habits, try to “read” if she’s the type who wants commitment or fun. Of course, my eagle eye skills told me nothing about that, but while I was looking and looking and looking at her I did notice something: she’s quite pretty and I’m not the only guy working there who checks her out. And that made me a little bit anxious. I need to have her!

During the lunch break, I “accidentally” ran into her and we shared the same table for a wonderful hour. I tried to keep the flirting to a minimum and act as natural as possible (just as I said a while ago about the whole flirting technique) and she proved to be a really charming, enjoyable person – there are moments when you realize even more that women should never be treated as I try to treat them, that they are human beings and they really deserve much more attention than we (as in men) are ready to offer. However, I have a quest here and, as unpleasant as it is, I have to keep going.

And that was about it today. I just got to meet her a bit better, we talked, we enjoyed each other, we promised to spend some more time together. By the end of the week I need to have had her in my bed already and I need to move on – I noticed that, starting the “O incident” I started to become a bit too sensitive when it comes to girl. That should change, for at least 11 more months.

Jul 2, 2008

The work flirt (or just friends?)

I was really planning to take a little break this week from flirting, dating and trying to get all the willing girls in my bed. Really, it is pretty hard and energy consuming to keep thinking at pickup lines, keep being what every girl wants you to be (because, to be honest, there is no need to be yourself when everything that matters is sex). But, as I said, all these kind of raises your stress level way too high. Not to mention the fact that I had an awful week, even though I did manage to score three chicks and, overall, it was a great dating/flirting/bed hopping frenzy.

But, as it usually happens in life, whenever you're planning to take a break, you can't. Or at least sort of, as it happens in my particular case (oh, why didn't any of these happen during the five years I've been together with M???). Anyway... I must admit that, in the end, I can't complain about that especially because I don't even know if it is indeed reality or just my imagination.

Here's what happened today at work (yes, as strange as this might sound, I do have a work place, I'm not spending my entire life searching for girls to flirt with and do :D). One of my few girl colleagues suddenly started to seem very interested in what I'm doing and what I'm saying now, even though we know each other for about three months, since she started working here (and she never seemed interested in anybody more than in professional kind of way - and I'm not working in a whorehouse :D). So, today, while I was eating a chicken sandwich on a bench in a nearby park, she appeared out of nowhere and sat without even asking if she can do that (of course I would've had nothing against that, since she is quite charming and beautiful).

Out of the blue, she started to tell me how hard it is for her to accommodate with life in this new city (she’s in her first year at one university here), that she did not manage to make any friends, that she started to forget what having fun means and so on (of course, she said it in a different, not so direct way, but that was the idea). Because I did not know anything about her true intentions, I kind of backed up a little, saying that it was the same for me when I moved in, but I’m sure things will change. Then she spent five more minutes with me, talking about the job and left to "grab a bite to eat". But, following the lunch break, I noticed her looking at me every now and then – either throwing quick glances at me, or completely staring at me and continuing eye contact even after I look back at her. And this could mean that she wants IT, too.

But I must look at this whole situation very carefully: if these are indeed signs that she's interested in me, she probably wants something more than a one night stand or something similar – most likely, she is preparing for a relationship. Which I'm not planning on doing, since my girl quest has just started. And except from that, I enjoy having fun with random girls every now and then, even though this is a very tiresome thing to do. Anyway, back to my colleague – if she indeed wants a relationship with me and I take advantage of that to get into her bed and write another name on my list (I know, males are such pigs sometimes!), it would have as a result a pretty strange situation at work and it could, probably, lead to more conflicts than anybody would need. Damn... I hate when I have to take important decisions!