Showing posts with label surprise. Show all posts
Showing posts with label surprise. Show all posts
Aug 15, 2008
How to get Emo chicks
Honestly, I have had very few contacts with emo kids, emo as a phenomenon and I doubt I have ever listened to any Emo music (at least if I did, I never knew what it was). Anyway, I kept hearing jokes about these sad kids and my general idea about emo people was that they kind of sucked… you know, as in “pathetic losers”...Yesterday night I went to have a drink with a friend of mine and we ended making fun of these “pathetic losers” – none of us actually knowing what “being emo” means. You know, it was the talk before you think thing – it's not a first for me, unfortunately :D
Anyway, after a while, we got to the brilliant conclusion that since Emo chicks consider themselves pathetic losers, good-for-nothing babes, ugly and God knows what else, it would be pretty easy to get them. I mean… if I were a desperate, 350 lbs dude with stinky breath and a 3 inch wiener, I’d probably accept any girl. You get the idea. What matters the most is the fact that we decided to start a new marathon: get the emo chicks.
Of course, there were two problems here: we were I know, a complete piece of crap, but when you’re drunk, some things seem nothing but pure genius!
So we kept walking, emptying the backpack and not finding any emo chicks. Of course, we were so caught up with our plans and fantasies and stuff that we probably passed by tons of good to get girls… but it doesn’t matter, because in the end we got what we deserved and it was priceless!
In a slightly illuminated area, there were groups of two people (4-5, at most) sitting in pairs every here and there, drinking and talking and smoking. Emo girls! My friend and I got our eyes on the most pathetic looking of them all (a chick with a strange Sonic-like hairstyle and a little chubby one having Cloud’s haircut). Anyway, two lonely girls, pissed off on life,
willing to let us prove them things are actually better. Or just do them, no strings attached :DSo we sat down relatively close to the girls – we didn’t want to appear to be too pushy, not to scare them and we started to talk. Being funny. Probably utterly failing, since we were drunk, but back then everything seemed great. Anyway… eventually we started to talk about the fact that we were all alone, that we could use some company… stuff like that, preparing the big approach and the big "getting of the emo chicks" followed by an effortless night of banging and good-bye-baby. It wasn’t meant to be.
Because before we ended our flirting program, the two Emo chicks got up and one said to another something like: “Let’s go, dude! These gay fu*** are horrible” and the chubby one agreed: “F***ing fa*s!” We were shocked. We just did our best (even though drunk) to get two guys! Our highly anticipated success with the Emo chicks proved to be a total fluke. And, man, last night was the moment when I decided: never trust these Emo persons again. You can really not be sure if they take their trousers down and prove to be some hunky dudes! Eeeek!
Aug 1, 2008
I rock!
I keep seeing on various blogs different things regarding the Page Rank. It seems that it’s a pretty important thing, since so many people are completely excited if their PR goes up or feel the sky had crumbled and fell on their heads if the PR got down. In other words, it’s something that matters to them, so I have decided to check mine.
To my surprise (to my big, huge surprise, since this blog is so “young”), I have a page rank of 3. It made me feel like a superstar, or something, like a rock star and now I’m awaiting for groupies to come and please me. Of course, it’s something that only happens in my mind. So far, to me, page rank doesn’t mean anything but a number: traffic from search engines remains the same and I am not at all more lucky at scoring or flirting with chicks. So I’m not such a big rock star, after all. But I needed an excuse to post thins beautiful picture. :D
Jul 5, 2008
Breaking news
I was just getting ready to go to the club again, girl hunting, but my plans had to change (into much better, I anticipate). I just got a call from a good old girl friend of mine who announced me she's going to visit. Apparently she just got back in the country (she managed to move in the US about ten years ago together with her family).
Anyway, the idea is that I had a crush on her when I was much younger and she admitted during some of the chats we had online that she also liked me back then. Sometimes we would even start fantasizing about how would've our lives looked like if she wouldn't have gone abroad. And now she calls me on the phone saying "Surprise!". And I know the girl, she's very open minded - if everything goes as it should and I won't screw up, we should end by having sex. So stay tuned, 'cuz I'm sure pictures will follow! :D
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