Showing posts with label girl. Show all posts
Showing posts with label girl. Show all posts
Aug 15, 2008
How to get Emo chicks
Honestly, I have had very few contacts with emo kids, emo as a phenomenon and I doubt I have ever listened to any Emo music (at least if I did, I never knew what it was). Anyway, I kept hearing jokes about these sad kids and my general idea about emo people was that they kind of sucked… you know, as in “pathetic losers”...Yesterday night I went to have a drink with a friend of mine and we ended making fun of these “pathetic losers” – none of us actually knowing what “being emo” means. You know, it was the talk before you think thing – it's not a first for me, unfortunately :D
Anyway, after a while, we got to the brilliant conclusion that since Emo chicks consider themselves pathetic losers, good-for-nothing babes, ugly and God knows what else, it would be pretty easy to get them. I mean… if I were a desperate, 350 lbs dude with stinky breath and a 3 inch wiener, I’d probably accept any girl. You get the idea. What matters the most is the fact that we decided to start a new marathon: get the emo chicks.
Of course, there were two problems here: we were I know, a complete piece of crap, but when you’re drunk, some things seem nothing but pure genius!
So we kept walking, emptying the backpack and not finding any emo chicks. Of course, we were so caught up with our plans and fantasies and stuff that we probably passed by tons of good to get girls… but it doesn’t matter, because in the end we got what we deserved and it was priceless!
In a slightly illuminated area, there were groups of two people (4-5, at most) sitting in pairs every here and there, drinking and talking and smoking. Emo girls! My friend and I got our eyes on the most pathetic looking of them all (a chick with a strange Sonic-like hairstyle and a little chubby one having Cloud’s haircut). Anyway, two lonely girls, pissed off on life,
willing to let us prove them things are actually better. Or just do them, no strings attached :DSo we sat down relatively close to the girls – we didn’t want to appear to be too pushy, not to scare them and we started to talk. Being funny. Probably utterly failing, since we were drunk, but back then everything seemed great. Anyway… eventually we started to talk about the fact that we were all alone, that we could use some company… stuff like that, preparing the big approach and the big "getting of the emo chicks" followed by an effortless night of banging and good-bye-baby. It wasn’t meant to be.
Because before we ended our flirting program, the two Emo chicks got up and one said to another something like: “Let’s go, dude! These gay fu*** are horrible” and the chubby one agreed: “F***ing fa*s!” We were shocked. We just did our best (even though drunk) to get two guys! Our highly anticipated success with the Emo chicks proved to be a total fluke. And, man, last night was the moment when I decided: never trust these Emo persons again. You can really not be sure if they take their trousers down and prove to be some hunky dudes! Eeeek!
Aug 13, 2008
Gentlemen don’t tell
There are some things a guy should keep for himself. There are accidents, stuff like that, things that can completely screw up your life (or, if you’re SMART enough, they can provide some good fun for you). Anyway, the idea is that sh*t happens. And all these “accidents” that happen along your lifetime just add up, sum up and eventually manage to drive you mad, no matter if you made fun of them or not. Because, generally, you don’t make fun of them. You can’t tell about this stuff to your friends – and it’s understandable. Gentlemen don’t tell. Period.Last night, happy and excited, I found out that A, my latest flirting extravaganza, really meant it with the three dates rule (and, no matter how stupid I consider that idea or concept or whatever, I’m not going to talk about it right now). Anyway, the fact is that we were sharing my bed, cuddling and kissing, whispering and caressing each other – having fun and, all in all, we were getting ready to do it “as they do it on Discovery channel”. And then it happened: Badda Bing!
My body, my flirting king body rejected me and told me to go to Hell, after promising me the moon and some extra. Most unfortunate is that A. also promised me a looot of things (“I’ll do this and that and that, too”). Anyway… the idea is that everything was destroyed in just a couple of seconds… MAYBE a minute. Badda Bang!
Because I finished. I was done. “Oops”-like. “WTF-was-that?”-like. Badda Bing and no Boom Boom Boom. You get the idea. It was that most absolute embarrassing thing. As in “I’m sorry, I dunno what happened”, as in Speedy-Gonzales style… actually, it seems that I proved to myself that indeed I am Mr. Fast. Damned coincidences!The fact is that you feel so bad in such moments that you can’t describe it in words. I was shocked, ashamed and I just didn’t have the guts to look into A.’s eyes. I was feeling her – she was ready to start laughing, she was ready to grab the phone and tell her friends, she was ready to ask questions or just go away. Anyway… one thing is certain: no girl in the world can imagine what goes through a man’s mind and heart when something like that happens. When stuff you don’t talk about happens. When stuff we don’t like to admit is true… that’s the real deal with Gentlemen don’t tell. And it sucks.
But, to end this on a lighter, happier note, it just got to me: I should’ve told her “It’s your fault, biatch! You and your stupid three dates rule! You see how close I was to explode into my pants?” And then we would’ve laughed and gave it another try. Or not. But since I was inside and kind of did my job, she counts. Beat this!
Aug 10, 2008
Back on track
Finally, for the first time in my life I managed to move fast and quickly get over a semi-failure. Even though Phone Girl is right – I’s the kind of girl I have to seek and get, it is always good to see that your flirting style can give you something better - even if it’s more work for one to pick up a better girl. Flirting is not an easy job!Last night I went together with my friends at a party, it was somebody’s birthday and we all met up in a pub where one thing was not missing: booze. Nor girls, to be honest, but most of them were already taken. Anyway, my luck was that I was seated near a girl I did not know, but who was single – a very open minded person, a great company, and a pretty one too. Her name was A and she was quite a chat. Also, she didn’t seem to be there to find a date, an ONS or even to seek for a relationship – she was there to have fun and luckily I was around (to change things, heh)
We spent some quality time talking and joking and, that’s God, I was really pleased to see that I can do much better than the night before. A. is a kind of a Tom-girl, though: she mixed beer and wine, drank about as much as I did, but I was the one who seemed to be drunker. Not to mention the fact that she was very direct in saying what was on her mind… you know, the type of girl you might have sex with and talk about football or cars. Heh… or so I imagine.Because, even though A. and I had a great night and spent some really quality time together, when I asked her (late at night) if she wants to come to my place, or go somewhere else where there’s more privacy, she said something like: “Just wait a little, boy! We just met… don’t you know about the three dates rule?”
It was something vague for me but I said I did – under no circumstances I wanted push my luck with her, especially because most of my friends were there and she looked like the type of girl who could make quite a mess if she really wanted. But, on the other hand, we’re meeting later today and I hope she really meant it with the “three dates rule” – which means I’m close. Keep your fingers crossed for me!
Aug 3, 2008
So long, I!
I knew this weekend was going to have a major impact on my future. Even though I did not say it loud, a little bit of me was considering having a relationship with I. She proved to be a very special girl, with a ton of randomness, a girl which knows how to flirt, how to play, how to have fun. She is great and I don’t even remember if I got the girl or she got me, you know? It’s like we just met and united and there was no pick up involved.Anyway, a relationship was someway against My Girl Quest, my plans for full year of flirting and random chick scoring. So I wanted to test things a bit more – everybody would do that, if such a huge stake is in play.
The first thing I did when I got up on Saturday was to call her (of course, after P. left). I invited her over and I had absolutely no plans. Things started off pretty good, with her jumping on me, telling me she was just wondering how long was she going to last without IT. So I was already thinking about turning My Girl Quest into a “family diary” now. But we all do mistakes.
After doing it, we spent some time cuddling, talking and cuddling even more. She wanted to watch a movie. So we did. Then she got hungry and we had to go grab something to eat – just to return home. I don’t know what you say about that, but for me it was not the most exciting thing in the world. So I asked her what should we do, where should we go.
She said that she didn’t want to go anywhere – she just wanted to watch movies together with me, cuddle and maybe have sex before we go to bed. She said “maybe,” for God’s sake! Last week’s sex machine, was turning fast into a housewife. In just a week! Oh, no, I’m not going to fall for that!
So I bought some wine for courage, went home and got drunk a little. It was still hard for me to say it, but I did: I told her that the only reasons I keep dating her was sex, that I was not ready for a relationship, for commitment – you know, the regular “let’s take a break” thingie that’s nothing but a softer way to say “eff off!”
She took it like a man, so to say. “This means we’ll only see one another when we want to do it?” she asked. I was 100% surprised with that, but I am sure she’ll not be visiting my bed again anytime soon :D Well… at least I got rid of her and I’m more confident now. Having you last night’s date smell in your skin when you’re doing it with another woman is not the most common thing in the world. I am proud of me!
Sick + Compassion = Sex
No, for those of you asking, I. didn’t take me on a random trip this weekend, too – it was just me being too lazy to post, even though I did promise to be posting daily on my progress. Oh, well, maybe it’s better to come up with lots of things once, so that your life seems to be more interesting than it is. Heh.On Friday night I played in sick and told my work colleague (I.) that going out was not the best thing for me to do and I even managed to convince her she shouldn’t even come to my place to “take care of me”. I kind of backstabbed her here – I said that if she came, I would not be able to resist her looks and we'd end up doing it rather than resting and take care of my health. And it seems that, for me, keeping the interest high in me (even though it’s not to my own… interest) is something I do better than flirting. Damn, you'll probably re-read that just to understand a quarter of what I said. lol
The real reason why I did not want some wild sex with I. was my intention to finally do something with P and get rid of her. I just invested too much time not to get anything out of this, too. So I was a bit of a pig, but it was all good in the end: I called her and played sick again (some things just work :D) and asked her to come over so we could watch a movie and cuddle and make me feel better. She kind of wanted to go out and have some fun, but she still came.
My plan was to force things a bit: I was only in my boxer shorts (feeling sick, you know) and she didn’t have anything against that. However, I told her that I was having a fever and I was cold and eventually asked her to hug me, "maybe that will help," I said. We stood like that for a while, which was a perfect time for me to whisper into her ears the sweetest possible words. She liked that (every woman does) and we soon started groping, kissing and stuff.
But I was sick and weak, remember? So, I really wanted to take a shower in order to cool off a little, and I asked her to take me there. She must’ve been a bit excited, too, since she allowed me to insist and ask her to join me - “Just as we did in the bed,” I said. She was still reluctant.So I stripped and went to take the shower, I kept asking her to come: she was there, still looking, probably having a fight with her inner self if she should do it or not. Eventually, the devil on her shoulder won the fight, and she joined me: it was for the first time in at least one year (I’m sure it’s been longer, though) when I had sex under the shower. And it was great, there was some huge sexual tension between me and P. and we both felt relief after we did it. The only problem is that she’s probably considering we have a strong relationship right now. Her loss :D
(Note: I see this is getting too long, I’ll write a new entry on my flirting success yesterday)
Jul 25, 2008
All the girls come back, eventually
I’m in a real hurry – I have a date with I. today – but I must clarify what happened last night, since my last post is not exactly relevant – since, usually, starting with things like “I’m pathetic, I can’t change my life, I’m ugly and a bad flirt” and ending with “Yay! I’m sooo happy” could mean one of two things: you’re either a real lunatic, or you really have problems stating what you feel.Anyway, that’s not important: I went to meet with P. again last night and she did show up - she indeed seemed really sorry, she kept apologizing for her departure but said it was something important and urgent and stuff. However, she did swear to me that it was no deal of her with her friends or something like that. (I also asked her if she’s a secret agent or if she’s living a double life and she said no, too… damn!). However, since she did not tell me exactly why she had to go, I still have my doubts.
But she agreed to come to my place, to “prove you I’m sorry,” she said. And you probably imagine that these words have a specific sense in the context, right? Well… she was literary talking about saying the words “I’m sorry” over and over again – because sex was the last thing she had in mind. I even thought, in my horny and strange mind, that she probably went and did it in an elevator with a big bad dude and then came to me to hold her in my arms and cuddle and stuff. Of course, it was just my mind. :)
I didn’t even try too much – even though we shared the same bed and I tried at first to be a bit pushy, there are signals everybody can get and I didn’t want to force her. It was getting pretty late, too and I am 100% sure today I’m going to get laid with my strange colleague, so I had to be all rested and ready to go.
As you can see, it wasn’t a complete revival of my luck, but it was, at least, better than I was expecting at first. I still have a little entry door open with P. since I promised I’ll call her and we’ll meet again, but I’m not doing anything until I know for sure what’s in I’s mind. Damn, I’m such a busy person! :D
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Picture credits: coghillcartooning
Jul 24, 2008
Tonight we dine at my place
As soon as I finish posting this quick entry I will go and meet with P. – it’s our third date already and I hope she knows that three is the right moment to start doing something. Oh, God, I hope I’ll be dead tired tomorrow at work, but with another girl’s name written in my secret notebook. It’s always hard to convince a girl who doesn’t want to do you that she should. It’s all about the game and I don’t know its rules yet. Heh.However, I already feel like I’m living two lives: at work I’m flirting with I., during my five minute breaks I call P. and tell her how much I want to be with her… actually, tomorrow I kind of have a date with I. Everything is getting a bit messy here and I truly hope I won’t end up disappointed and basically screwed up by both girls. It has been too long since my last “session” for real and I don’t like it. Hopefully tonight things will change. They have to change! Wish me luck!
Jul 13, 2008
The sexiest EURO 2008 fans (NSFW)
You probably remember the eye candy that used to be my The sexiest EURO 2008 girls entry, presenting the most beautiful and sexy girls found at EURO 2008. Well, now I have found the ultimate treat for you, found while searching for a certain picture on flickr. Yes, it's a rather lengthy post, but I am sure every male on this planet will love it. Hell, when I see that much beauty I can't help but wonder how could it feel to know you have such sexy fans (as a football player, I mean). Anyway, I'm sure you don't want to see my thoughts and only skip to the images, so here you go (and, even though I promised I will never again post photo-entries, I hope you can understand it was needed)
We'll start with two white angels, Greek and Russian sexy fans:
We'll start with two white angels, Greek and Russian sexy fans:
This Swedish girl (on the right) is the most beautiful girl I have ever seen in ages. I could not, however, understand which teams did the first two beauties represent.
If Poland and Spain played so well for this year's EURO 2008, I can understand why. With such great fans, you'd have your reasons, right?
This Croatian (probably) chick on the left is clearly thinking about something else but football :D But I can't say football is the first thing I have in mind while checking the second girl, a sexy Turkish fan :D
This Romanian chick on the right is definitely a girl I'd love to date during my girl quest. Is it possible, God? The second picture presents us a sexy French fan who likes some lickin'.
Switzerland and Portugal seem to have the most sporty fans. Way to go, girls! Exercise is what makes a perfect body (and they seem to know that)
The best two pics, in my opinion and definitely the sexiest of them all. An Italian fan that is definitely the EURO 2008 winner and a Holland beauty which seems to be thinking more at American football, not soccer, but we'll forgive her.
Two more angels, the German and Czech best female supporters:
And, finally, the host of the tournament: Austria fan!
And, now... I don't know about you, but I need a cold, cold shower. These girls are definitely more fanatic than the first presented in the previous post mentioned above. Also, the fact that they love body painting that much, makes them even better. Hopefully, when my year-long Girl Quest will reach to an end, I'll have at least half as beautiful girls in my "repertoire". Until then, feel free to share your opinion and decide who's the best looking of them all. I can't decide between the Italian, Turkish and Swedish fans.
____________________All credit for the pictures go to Strokker1
Jul 6, 2008
A perfect time in the company of a lady
Her name is O. I could say that we’re friends since we were born – we were never lovers, but we always talked about “what if…” We used to flirt, usually online, since she was miles and miles away from me (or vice-versa, depending on the point of view :D). We used to say that whenever we will meet again, if we'll ever meet again, we’ll have a night to remember. And that happened last night.
I went to pick her up from our meeting place, feeling nervous, feeling the butterflies in the stomach – exactly as you feel when you first fall in love, with the only exception that I was not in love (nor falling). I was very excited, though – meeting a girl you have talked that much with, you have known for that long and you admire (yes, I really admire O.), meeting her for the first time, face to face, after a ten year long break – that is something! My heart was beating like it was on steam, my mind was in the 20th cloud and I was over excited – happily, I managed not to hit any car and safely reached the destination.
When I saw her, I felt my knees are weak, I felt the ground trying to swallow me: she was more beautiful than I was anticipating (even though I have seen her tens of times on webcam – it’s completely different in real life!). She was no longer the little girl I used to play hide and seek with and do all sorts of strange things – somehow, I was still considering her a child until we met. She was a woman, she was smoking hot, she had a great, fit body, a perfect tan, a smile that could make you smile back instantly, she just had an aura which made you feel like hugging her, like a little child. Which I did – and when I touched her soft, perfumed skin, I felt the electrifying sensation of love. Or something very similar. Something which is hard to explain and it is not necessary sexual.
We kept talking – we had a LOT of catching up to do, she had a lot to say, there were a lot of sweet memories from when we were kids and used to play out in the yard together... When she talked, she kept looking straight into my eyes. Every now and then she was biting her lower lip – and I never saw before something as sensual as that. It was like the forbidden fruit, it was like the ripest apple: something you HAD to taste. But she was just teasing. She was smiling, seeing how uncomfortable that was making me. She was just playing – it was nothing but a game for her, as it happened when we used to chat online. It was not a date. She was not really flirting. Or… was she?
The music was great: we listened to a few “hits” from our childhood, we laughed when we remembered how 
much we loved that crap; she danced a little, teasing me even more, when one of her favorite hip hop tracks started playing; she innocently looked at me when Nick Cave started to sing his duet with PJ Harvey – one of the best and strangest love songs ever created, Henry Lee (and we danced); then, thanks to the shuffle mode, Another Level began when they started singing Freak me (and we kissed - suddenly, quickly, without warning).
I thought that was the beginning. I was aching for her. I was aching to feel her, I was planning to get her to bed and never let her go. Or so I was thinking. But she had other plans. She said “So that’s how it feels kissing you” then stoarted t dance again. When I tried to kiss her again, she didn’t allow me to. She started to talk in riddles: “Life’s a game,” she said. “Well, I really want to play,” I said, and it was probably the line of my life. She just giggled and told me to get us something to drink.
You can imagine that I was sure we were just “warming up” – drinks, music, dancing, her biting her lips, looking sexy, being sexy, breathing sexy… you get the deal. However, we just talked. Yes, sorry to disappoint you – we only talked, about everything, about anything. But I really had the time of my life. Hopefully it was the same for her – I don’t know, she seemed to have had everything well planned way before. Because she said,
during a silence break, when I was starting to get lost into her beautiful eyes: “I want to spend the night with you. I want to sleep over. I won’t, because we both know what would happen in such a case. And we both want that, too. But we should not – I’ll tell you tomorrow why”. A riddle again, but I accepted to play. I could’ve sold my soul to the devil during those moments, just to be sure I’ll get the chance to spend more time with her. So we talked a bit more. I asked her if can I take a few pictures of her “to share with the world”. What you see in the post is the result.
And the next day began. Today. We met again – she wanted us to “go out,” and I was her slave, I would’ve gone anywhere. We went and visited a few of the places where we used to play when we were kids and, once again, sweet memories began to come back to us. She took me to the park and we walked through the alleys, hand in hand – she said all that was everything we would’ve done if she wouldn’t have gone in the
But I was starting to wonder when that “I’ll tell you tomorrow why” thing will happen. When were we going to get back to my place and go to heaven. She kept delaying that, she kept walking, she kept exploring, she kept bringing me to life. And I was soon going to understand what was her plan. Her brilliance. That particular something which makes her to be as special as I consider her to be.
After countless hours of walking and talking and never getting bored, while we were resting in a pub, drinking a soda, she started to explain (and, like I did until know, I will quote her from my memory): “Being together with you is a wonderful thing,” she said. “It’s fun, it’s great, it’s much better than what I was remembering to be. It feels better than when we were kids, it is much better than what I was imagining when we talked online…” She was looking straight into my eyes, holding my hand. I was muted. “Just like I said last night, I want to go home with you, I want to feel you deep inside me, I want us to have the same great time we had until now. BUT I don’t want this ‘special’ feeling to fade away. I don’t want my memories for you to be, in a couple of years: ‘the guy I spent some quality time with and had sex and left and it was OK’. I don’t want this pain I’m feeling to go away, I don’t want you to scratch this itch, because I want the memories. Because I want to remember you, exactly as I knew you until now: great, special, unique. Sex would destroy the whole thing and I want it unaltered. I want to always feel this itch and always ask myself ‘what if,” she said. And that, my friends, was the best “I love you” I ever heard in my life. That was the moment I started to think that My Girl Quest is pointless. That life is pointless. That O. is the only person in the world who matters.
She is going to leave in a short trip in the country for a few days, then come back here for one or two more days, then forever leave the country (and maybe just to visit every ten years, as it happened now). Miles and miles will be between us but, as she said, the memory will never die. And probably that’s the best thing for both of us – to always remember. Because, in my humble opinion, there is nothing worst than being forgotten. Than losing the last shade of love from the person you loved the most. I know, one can’t generally speak about love after (basically) one date, but this is different. This is a life lesson she wanted to teach me, this is something only a great person would or could do. O. is that wonderful person and only know I realize how complete my life is, because I know her. Because she is my friend. Because I did not ruin everything with a pointless sex session. Yes, I truly believe her – there are times (special times, like this one, one of a kind moments) when sex is really pointless. Otherwise, I wouldn’t say now, from all my heart, that I had the best time of my life during this weekend. The best. Thanks, O.!
Jul 5, 2008
Breaking news
I was just getting ready to go to the club again, girl hunting, but my plans had to change (into much better, I anticipate). I just got a call from a good old girl friend of mine who announced me she's going to visit. Apparently she just got back in the country (she managed to move in the US about ten years ago together with her family).
Anyway, the idea is that I had a crush on her when I was much younger and she admitted during some of the chats we had online that she also liked me back then. Sometimes we would even start fantasizing about how would've our lives looked like if she wouldn't have gone abroad. And now she calls me on the phone saying "Surprise!". And I know the girl, she's very open minded - if everything goes as it should and I won't screw up, we should end by having sex. So stay tuned, 'cuz I'm sure pictures will follow! :D
Jul 2, 2008
The work flirt (or just friends?)
I was really planning to take a little break this week from flirting, dating and trying to get all the willing girls in my bed. Really, it is pretty hard and energy consuming to keep thinking at pickup lines, keep being what every girl wants you to be (because, to be honest, there is no need to be yourself when everything that matters is sex). But, as I said, all these kind of raises your stress level way too high. Not to mention the fact that I had an awful week, even though I did manage to score three chicks and, overall, it was a great dating/flirting/bed hopping frenzy.
But, as it usually happens in life, whenever you're planning to take a break, you can't. Or at least sort of, as it happens in my particular case (oh, why didn't any of these happen during the five years I've been together with M???). Anyway... I must admit that, in the end, I can't complain about that especially because I don't even know if it is indeed reality or just my imagination.
Here's what happened today at work (yes, as strange as this might sound, I do have a work place, I'm not spending my entire life searching for girls to flirt with and do :D). One of my few girl colleagues suddenly started to seem very interested in what I'm doing and what I'm saying now, even though we know each other for about three months, since she started working here (and she never seemed interested in anybody more than in professional kind of way - and I'm not working in a whorehouse :D). So, today, while I was eating a chicken sandwich on a bench in a nearby park, she appeared out of nowhere and sat without even asking if she can do that (of course I would've had nothing against that, since she is quite charming and beautiful).
Out of the blue, she started to tell me how hard it is for her to accommodate with life in this new city (she’s in her first year at one university here), that she did not manage to make any friends, that she started to forget what having fun means and so on (of course, she said it in a different, not so direct way, but that was the idea). Because I did not know anything about her true intentions, I kind of backed up a little, saying that it was the same for me when I moved in, but I’m sure things will change. Then she spent five more minutes with me, talking about the job and left to "grab a bite to eat". But, following the lunch break, I noticed her looking at me every now and then – either throwing quick glances at me, or completely staring at me and continuing eye contact even after I look back at her. And this could mean that she wants IT, too.
But I must look at this whole situation very carefully: if these are indeed signs that she's interested in me, she probably wants something more than a one night stand or something similar – most likely, she is preparing for a relationship. Which I'm not planning on doing, since my girl quest has just started. And except from that, I enjoy having fun with random girls every now and then, even though this is a very tiresome thing to do. Anyway, back to my colleague – if she indeed wants a relationship with me and I take advantage of that to get into her bed and write another name on my list (I know, males are such pigs sometimes!), it would have as a result a pretty strange situation at work and it could, probably, lead to more conflicts than anybody would need. Damn... I hate when I have to take important decisions!
Jun 30, 2008
The funny faker
Don’t you just hate these guys who have “fake” written all over their body? What about those who keep injecting steroids and love to compliment one another: “Uh, dude! You gotz a fit azz!”, while talking like a mini - Arnold? Well… I know I can’t really stand them.
And today I witnessed how one of these cyborg-dudes was silenced by a skinny girl (she was a quarter of his size). I laughed like a mad man and instantly knew I had to share.
So… I was drinking a hot frappe coffee during my lunch break, admiring the girls and their adorable summer clothing (I had no intentions of flirting yet, though – last week was enough for me, for the moment, of course). Anyway… just a few tables away was this guy: huge (as in muscle-huge), bald and, I must admit, a quite scary fellow. He was sipping some natural juice from a bottle and probably had his hormones skating and felt the need to get a girl.
A short, very skinny girl was passing by his table when he decided to be a “male”: he reached out his had, like a barrier and stopped her by saying something smart like “Hey, babe!”. Even though I would’ve probably pissed my pants in such a moment, the girl had a great, priceless reaction any date fanatic would’ve applauded. She said “They should photograph you and show the pic to the kids and say ‘Don’t do steroids!’”know how to flirt! (and I’m one of them :D) Thank God I’m not pumping my biceps’ too!
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Image credits: Robert Kopecky
Jun 28, 2008
The end of a love story… or something
As I said, I had some really mixed feelings for A. She was loveable and angelic but, as I was going to find out, she was far from being an angel. And I tend to believe that E. was right to feel mad on her (just to keep up with the captions, E. is the neighbor I did earlier this week and part of the reason why T and I don’t talk anymore)
Anyway… it was proved to me that A. was quite a devil. After the strange night we had, I woke up feeling pretty OK: I was still feeling bad following the punches received from the drunk guy, but all in all was OK. I wasn’t in the mood to flirt, though… but there was no reason to do that, after all: I already had the girl, A. and there are no rules against spending more than one night with the same chick, right? Especially if she does a great job at being a… female, you know? So I wanted to spend a few more hours with her, maybe do her one more time, then get my ass in the car and drive home and forget about that place. Again, God had other plans!
When I woke up she was already awake, naked, looking at her body in the mirror and putting on some make-up. Of course, I found the view really exciting (duuh!) and thought it was my lucky morning, but she told me to go take a shower and prepare to have some fun. She said we still had a lot to do. And this scared me a bit. “We”? “a lot to do”? What the hell? We barely knew each other, we had NOTHING to do except make up, kiss and say goodbye. But, since I’m not that alpha male I sometimes pretend to be… I said “OK” and went to take the shower.
I found out the plans: we had to go eat the breakfast out (we did), we had to leave the car in the parking lot and go for a walk to look at some clothes (we did, but I did not buy her anything – and she didn’t seem to be affected by that at the moment), we had to stop at a fancy pub and drink beer (?!? yes, she wanted that and we did it!), then walk a bit more because “that’s what people do”… and stuff like that. For at least four hours we did strange things, couple's things, something we shouldn’t have done. I was afraid she was going to take me meet her family soon!
Instead, she told me something like: “How much can one drink without getting to the hospital?” and basically invited me to another pub to find out the answer. Don’t get me wrong… I totally liked her attitude, but it was scary as hell what she was doing – it’s not something you do with strangers, right? Still… there was something pushing me from behind and I accepted her invite and went to “get wasted”.
I have no idea what pub was that or where was it compared to her apartment, but every single body there seemed to know my angelic A. And, even worse, she seemed to know everybody – but that was not something to make me think there was something fishy somewhere. I mean… people have friends, and I’m not the one to judge! So we kept drinking. And we kept doing it until we were pretty drunk. And we talked. A lot. And you know how people tell strange secrets from their past when they’re drunk? Well… the same did A.
She admitted to me that she was a kind of an escort in the past – she had no “manager”, she was on her own. No contracts, no direct payment, only “let’s flirt, let’s do it, buy me a present”. Something that is, unfortunately, a common thing in my country and many girls do that. A. was one of those – she admitted that (no, don't think prostitution, it's not exactly the same thing). But she also admitted that with me “it was different”. Back then, because I was drunk, I believed her and felt kind of honored. To have a tramp like you is a real achievement! To flirt with her, pick her up and do her no strings attached – it’s a huge achievement. So I was feeling like a real man back then and, naive, I believed her.
Eventually she told me to pay for the drinks and go home. She said had a little “treat” for me. But, before all that, she told me that she would love to have something from me… something to make keep me alive in her memories. And I was drunk and agreed to buy her a present. Big mistake. Because that was everything she wanted from me, actually (well… at least she offered something in exchange… but it is still not very encouraging and definitely not something to lose a friend for).
Anyway… to finish this post and the story (I realize that I am absolutely boring, but it’s the fault of the tiredness I have accumulated): when we were heading from the shop to her apartment for me to get that "treat", I was stopped by the police. I was pretty drunk and they almost suspended my driver’s license, but I managed to get away with that. At home we had some great, great fun and she kept saying me that I was different, that she was sure we could work it out and start a relationship.
I was going to leave the next day, though. And she was not going to cry. Now she has a nice gift. I just have another girl’s name to write on My Girl Quest's list. And a bunch of really nice pictures of her (sorry for all the blur, but that’s how it should be done, …)
I’m still alive (part II)
And it’s not only that I’m still alive, but I am also home. Finally! And, for at least 24 hours, I don’t even want to think about dating, flirting, girls and my plan to have the fun in a teenager's way :D. I just want to jump into the bed (alone) and sleep and forget about everything that happened to me during this short mini-vacation. Of course, I shall tell you first as much of the story as I can (and it all seems to have happened years ago…)
So… after I was literary thrown out of the apartment, mad to the bone, I wanted to jump into the car and drive home, as any sane person would probably do. However, A. was pretty pissed off, too, and she invited me to have a drink: “I know a cheap bar with cheap booze to get us wasted. It’s close to my apartment”. Now… as mad as a male can be, he cannot ignore or refuse the innocent and subtle “let’s go f*** our brains out” from a beautiful girl. Basically, we had started something in T's apartment and we wanted to finish the "job" somehow. So I have accepted her invitation.
Bad decision!
Because that bar we went to, even though an indeed really cheap one, was filled with drunken people who got their testosterone level to skyrocket when they saw me and A. (uhm... basically, I'm sure that happened because they saw her, not me :D - she is indeed a really good looking girl – though, I am sure it didn’t matter too much for the guys in the bar). Of course, I noticed that instantly and so did she, but she still insisted we should at least drink something before leaving. And I accepted to stay there, since she made me understand that we were going to spend the night at her place. Oh, sacrifices...
However, the guys started to get really horny and pushy and I was already set to “fight mode” because of what happened earlier. Still, thanks to a lot of luck, a few well placed words from A and the begging of the bartender, I did not start a fight there and left (I am under no circumstances the “fighter” nor a guy who considers it “manly” to fight in bars or wherever… still, this time was different since I was really stressed).
But when we left, one of the guys from the bar followed us (I’m still thankful it was only one) and hit me when I was completely unaware of his presence. He was probably planning to abuse A. too, or God knows what, but he didn’t even get the chance to get close to her, because a couple of her neighbors were luckily outside and jumped in to help us. So I was, thankfully, the only victim. Yes, I'm still a wuss :D.
In the end, everything was pretty OK, though – A. took me to her apartment, took good care of me, treated my wounds and… since I was in such a pain, she took care of all the swellings on my body, if you know what I mean. And you should do, because I will definitely never forget that – such a pleasant combination between pure pleasure, the pain of the wounds and, eventually, the relief of losing all the stress I had accumulated until then. It was pure heaven! As soon as she finished pleasing me orally, I went immediately asleep, like a little baby (and probably she thought I was a complete moron but, hey! that’s life sometimes!)
And indeed a new life it was – the beginning of my new mini-vacation within the mini-vacation (or something strange like that). The new beginning, I could say. Because another interesting day followed. But I will try to tell what happened in a later post. Now I just want to rest a bit. It’s great to be home and feel the love. (I just said that "love" thing in the end because I think this picture below doesn't really fit the story :D)
Jun 23, 2008
How to get the bar girl
It feels kind of funny (in a bad way, if you can imagine something like that) to write about flirting, dating and promiscuous girls after a post like my previous one. But life has to go on and, after all, that’s what My Girl Quest is about. Or is finally starting to become "something", because if you only read my first entries you probably said “pathetic loser, you will fail!” And, back then, I would’ve said you were right. But things change. Pretty quickly sometimes.
Because today I can say that I am starting to become a new person: I have already managed to get over M., I have already managed to score a few chicks and both my flirting techniques (or guts) as well as sexual life are starting to skyrocket. Because... yes! Last night I scored again! Two girls in two consecutive nights, baby! I love this (new) city and my vacation!
Just like in the cheap movies, I scored a waitress – that kind of girl who is ready to believe you if you tell her she’ll become a famous movie star or supermodel, and she will immediately kneel in front of you to say “Thanks” while unzipping... Yes, I mean this girl was pretty stupid, too. The most do-able type of girl on the planet.
L. is her name and she was, once again, a really easy prey: and since it happened again, I honestly started to wonder if this is how this part of life is today. I’m talking about this “personal life” part of the life – about dating, flirting, about the whole sexual part of human kind. Is it that easy as it was for me these couple of weeks? You just have to ask for it and the girls say “OK”? No more flowers, romantic dates and long walks hand in hand, no more hour-long phone calls and so on? It seems that’s the way things are today and I’m starting to regret I lost all these during my past five years...
Anyway… back to L – as I said, she was an easy one (or I’m just a really lucky fellow). I went together with my friend (T.) and a few of his pals to a pub to have a few drinks before heading to the club, ready for a long night of mindless fun and lots of flirting. But it happened that I met L.
She’s that type of young wannabe which, like I said, hopes to become a famous movie star or singer or something like that and so she works in a fancy pub hoping for an agent to come and “discover” her. Meanwhile, she will probably offer free blowjobs to every guy who says he’s a photographer and can make her famous.
I had another technique to start with: the “dumb, oops, I didn’t know you can hear me” technique. Or the “safe” flirting option – you can call it as you wish. The point is that I told one of the guys at the table that I thought she looked like Angelina Jolie. Of course, she was near and she heard. Of course, that was the whole idea (and no, she had nothing in common with Angelina, except for the fact that she was a brunette :D). However, L. bought it. She instantly turned into honey: she was only looking at me whenever she came to our table (and she did come a lot more often than she should), we kept making eye-contact and eventually we started to “accidentally” touch one another’s hands. Which means that it was obvious. She wanted IT.
When I asked for her number, she brought it, just like a tramp, written on a paper towel from the bar (luckily, it was not written with lipstick). Only a few minutes after she brought it, I called her (and I really consider I did a nice thing) and said I was a secret admirer and we had to meet and go out for a date. Fortunately, she understood it was me and even considered it funny, so she accepted. Yes, I know. She just wanted IT.
Fast forward now: we talked and she was going to end her shift soon. I directly asked her “my place or your place?” (well, not that direct, but it's "fast forward" now, mmmkay?) and she said she lives with her mother. We went straight to T’s house and I lied her a bit – I told her I was a good friend of a few important journalists in my country and that I can help her appear on the cover of a magazine. She bought it again and, in exchange, she showed me she had the best skills in the world. Honestly – what the girl did to me was something adult movie stars could’ve learned a lot from. Unfortunately, that is about everything she knows to do. However, since I’m definitely not the first, nor the last person who took advantage of her, I do not feel too guilty. I’m not a beast. I’m just a flirt machine that’s finally starting to work as it should.
Note: No, this beautiful blond chick is not the girl I scored.
Jun 22, 2008
Lotta love for the woman above me
Just as I was expecting, this little holiday of mine already proved to be a lifesaver for My Girl Quest! It’s all different when you are away in another city, without caring that your friends might find you, without caring if a girl you use one night will tell her friends and slowly you will become a persona non grata. All you have to do in another city is – party, party, party! And that’s exactly what I plan to do – and have absolutely great results. I’m quite a stud, you know? (Yeah, I kept heard that if you keep repeating stuff to your silly little brain, you will start to believe that :D)
So… I have arrived yesterday here, in this
Anyway… back to the topic. As I was saying, when I met with my friend yesterday night, since I was pretty tired following the 8 hour-long road trip, I told him I’d rather spend the first night at home than going to a club – I just wasn’t in a mood for it. And God knows club girls feel everything and a bad mood would’ve been a definite No-No!
My friend agreed, but insisted that we should do at least some socializing, so he called a few friends to his apartment so we can play cards, drink a beer or two and talk – you know, old man’s style of fun.
But it turned out it was not that old school (or this is just how it always happens with me – I get all the fun when I am least expecting it) since my friend has the sexiest neighbor in the world. I mean – forget the sexy Euro 2008 chicks, this girl was the real deal! And she was right there, near me, not in
We started our “affair” just how high-school couples begin theirs – my friend, who knew some things about my desire to flirt, pick up and screw as many girls as possible, kept joking that me and her should be together, that she should kiss me since I haven't been with a woman since my gf left me (oh... if any of them knew the truth!) and so on. One bottle later, we were confy cuddling on the couch, completely ignoring the card-playing dudes. And, just a bit more later, we were in the room upstairs and I was screwing her brains out!
This means that I have four girls on my list. Much, much better than what I was expecting when I first started My Girl Quest and I was a complete wuss (well… I still am, but I’m in another city and I just know I will keep scoring. So please, pray for me :D)
Jun 18, 2008
The sexiest Euro 2008 girls
Following my bad experience with M, I felt like "surfing for girls". And, as you might know, the UEFA Euro 2008 is a place where the best football (soccer) teams meet on court. But have you ever wondered what happens off court? Well... with just a few clicks, I did! :D In the stands, where the fans are hoping for the best for their team? Well, let me assure you that there is the best for a man to watch. And, as a proof, I have selected a list of “best-of” girls from Euro 2008. Enjoy!
Note: I don’t really like posting “image-only” entries, but this time I’ll HAVE to make an exception. Just look at the chicks! (Oh, and also, I must admit that it took like forever to arrange them in the page. Click on the thumbs to enlarge and better use the “open in new tab/window option”)
First, the most beautiful Croatian, Austrian and Italian girls:
Now, some Czech, Greek and Holland angels:
German, French and Spanish super-fans:
Russian, Romanian and Polish cuties:
And a little Portuguese cherry:
If you enjoyed these sexy girls, visit my second entry featuring sexy Euro 2008 girls (click on the orange link!)
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Image from: Eurogirls
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